Misanthrope

He had always heard "no good deed goes unpunished". He did not know from experience because he assiduously avoided any good deeds. He would rifle through bins of donated clothes, not to provide a wardrobe for the numerous children he had fathered with several women, but to sell them in consignment shops. He regularly attended church services, never to worship, but only to scout out what he would steal later or to dip into the plate as it was passed. He was never kind to animals but adored the thrill of the hunt. He had joined the military, not out of a sense of duty or patriotism but because he relished the chance to take a human life. He knew the Bible chapter and verse, but he did not believe a word of it. He would present his girlfriends with flowers pilfered from graveyards. I suppose the abject lack of virtue could be forgiven, but what really galled me was that he always voted Republican.